Remembering Remembrance.

Lying on my back, watching the tales of life...screening from the back of my mind..From that painful catharsis...you lead me into a realm of untold secrets..a decision i made only to note revenge and protect a wounded soul..once kept in the closet,now i decided to show it off on the dressing table...the vain contradictions of words that you muttered before...i asked..do u know where your heart is? do you think you can find it? or is it that this poor soul has to find it for you? No,not me..never again...

When happiness is made, there is always room for sadness...you climb up so high, you got to climb back down again...jump maybe?..maybe not..Hypocrisy is such a common thing...you don't need to try and explain..just keep it..i rather listen to the sound of music than your self-contradicting words...

Ouh sweet drug...you help me sleep when i need it...those leftover sleeping pills from that saddistic moment when you left...the time when i troubled myself to keep on going..the time when my heart beat so fast it needs drugs to be calmed down..The time when i thought life was over for me...

The heart is still in pain...I thought i'm happy...But on some days when i'm lying on my back watching my mind....the pain is still heart felt...i realised..my heart is still within the wall of it's own hospital....

You're my favourite drug.

I shall think i need to go for rehab soon...the amount of your presence prescribed on me is under dosage. Cause your drug is so addictive, i'm having an addiction...and for if i escape rehab, i think i'll be caught up with the addiction..

All that is playing on and on in my head, is the time we've spent together, the care i'm giving u, the countless conversation we had, the wrestling in bed, the morning breakfast, the casual simple lunch break occasions and those crazy things we always say or do...the bullshits,the swears, the getting ons with each other's ass...those relationship problems we shared, those advices, those stories...

When ur sleeping, all i want to do is cuddle with you and rock you like a little baby...when you're so stress, all i want to do is take all your problems away...but still, all i want to do, is to be a friend to you, cause to think otherwise is impossible....

The absence of your presence is heart felt...i miss you already tho we part only hours ago...don't tell me i'm falling for you...cause it'll be so wrong....

Got to check in fast, cause babe, ur my disease....

The Fence.

Walking around in my head,I walked far and felt something immense,
Turning around, you stood there beyond the fence,
I walked nearer to sense your scent,
but still im on the other side of the fence,
Is it built for division or for defence?
Or is it there just to make my life a dense?

What gives what helps the intuition within me?
The cognition of love that coincides within thee,
The presence of absence that belittles around me
The absence of your presence left me empty,
The love felt is it unlikely?

You chose poetry over prose,
Facts that was seen only in your post,
I know i've not been revealing my most,
But have you ever think of the words you've chose?

Came along a heatwave, a merciful save
I'm hush now, trying not to crave,
My heart is weak i'm trying to be brave,
This is just how my heart is trying to behave.

And still I can't seem to be on the other side,
it's seems so hard which ever way i tried,
it seems the fence was misapplied.
How much more time before this feeling died?

For now,i'm just sitting on the fence,
to climb down back to my past
or jump to where i saw you last...
but still all this is happening in my mind,
i'm walking in it and hope the answers i'll find...

My "bimbotic" work

Well just finished my semestral exam. FYP next...life is effin hard nowadays...going for that scholarship though..enjoy my "bimbotic" works...

"Model"

The Lounge

The internet booth

The "bunk-beds"

*i'm still trying to post my trip pictures...hold on a bit more yeah...hahaha*

I HaTe tHis PaRt RiGhT HeRe..

Well..to be honest..i can't seem to understand what is going on in my mind..my heart....n... my soul..i let my mind run as wild as it can only to be trip by a branch that has fallen long before i knew and like that branch that once stood proud out of a tree to represent mother gia,my mind knocked hard on solid ground.....my heart was pounding and beating very fast...only responding to the thought of my mind running a race..only to be beaten by others and left to seek its unprecedented stand...it's like...blood is not enough for it to produce..it needs more than that...i can't feel myself anymore..im numb....numb as the kids on eden's lake..numb as thier parents..as numb as 'numb' by linkin park...as numb only the word itself cud understand..when its for the last time...i didn't expect u to just walk away rushing for the train to close...and my soul.....my soul just kept asking...when is she getting me a mate?

i hate this part right here...and i just can't take these tears....

Four lit-tle(britt-ish eccent) word

Let's welcome the ting tings to Singapore now..i know this song is sooo kental..but somehow, it makes me dance & happy...=)

In other retrospect of life, let's see how many four lit-tle (britt-ish eccent again mind you..) word can describe it:

Sick,Fuck,Dumb,Daft,Fool,Love,Hate,Lost, WeLL!

Oh well..* snaps finger *

Daft.

Ever the oracles, we’ve distilled the most interesting things we've learnt...they say we're not suppose to be judgemental on people's life..but eyes are judging you for not judging the outcome of an ever dire predictable situation..if that's the case..i don't bother..i should have known better..*sigh*

Guess i just got to wait for miss serendipity to come knocking on my door...cause i'm done with all this bullshit in life man...everything is so cryptical...yeah sure..why not right? as long as we're happy...wait...i mean you..happy with the decisions you made...how does this whole thing work sia??? gosh...i'm in shambles..daft at the moment..*roll eyes*

You make me throw all the pillows off the bed...then put it all back together again in the morning...